Who are we?

Introduction to the preppy girl...

How knowing and understanding my style changed me in the world I live in. (PART1)

They say envision the person you want to be and show up as them! Then keep showing up till you are them! Changing my style begun by changing how I identified. Why and how you ask, I created this persona (Kittens) around 2017 and the more I identified as them the more I became them. I took the quote quite literally.

KITTENS VS MACHIER M

Kittens pronouns are they/them/she/her. While Machier's are she/her. What's the difference, it all depends on who you meet. Now don't judge me I am certain I ain't the only person with personas for everyone / situation.

Kittens is the more queer version of me. Like I mentioned before the persona was created in 2017 and I wanted to be free. From what? Probably the closet (lol) Why?

I had just been outed by someone very close to me to my parents. And as expected that conversation did not go well I mean? lol

A midst of this anger, resentment and feeling of betrayal I said f*ck it! why hide any more if its already out? Hence the Name and persona Kittens.

Sure enough the name worked its magic. My followers increased and I got into the queer community. With new followers came the DMs that ever started with the question "Why Kittens?" And as expected these people had already come up with ideas of what the name stood for but if I am being honest I just liked it plus I got it from a queer dj, she goes by I AM KITTENS how could I not like it? My literal first thought was 'what a freeing name' so I became Kittens.

The name stuck around till it became mine and I became it. Somewhere in between Mercy got lost. (as expected) But not that kind of lost, allow me to explain; If I dare say Kittens became a "brand" I suddenly had so many followers (mostly queer people{no complains though} its what I lowkey wanted when starting that journey). But in trying to be more queer for the community I lost touch with who I really was. It slowly became a proof of identity, proof that I am one of you. Rather than my truth.

Now don't get me confused Machier has always been a part of my identity. Its literally my baptism name. But Ms.MachierM bestie that was a whole new being. After I realized that I don't even know why I have the name anymore (kittens) I took a break. And like clock work I lost a good number of my followers. And when I as fully back I didn't even care enough about who liked my post, who viewed my story and such. I posted a photo in two-three months but was still afraid to loose my name Kittens.

Well that was until I saw a video of ED SHEERAN talking about how socials should be used to promote your work and share ideologies but people post cause they are feeling shitty or having a shitty day and want to feel some kind of way through comments, views and likes. I kid you not I haven't given two shits about who is on my page, how many likes I am getting, who is commenting on my posts and so on. I mean what ED said is not exactly true but its not false either it all ends up with you as a person.

With the new found 'motivation' (quoted cause motivation is a construct) I decided to work on Machier while still keeping the name Kittens. We were back to envisioning the person I wanted to be.

So my research begun and from my previous post you are now well aware of who played a role in bringing Machier to life. My first step was my wardrobe I kid you not I literally have notes on having and creating a wardrobe. Sounds crazy I know but it makes a lot of sense and plays a big role when you are shopping and decluttering.

First step was getting rid of clothes I didn't feel like would show the person I was trying to become.

Second step was learning my colors. What goes well with my body features and all. The third step was learning my body knowing what to extenuate, what to show, what to cover up. The fourth was getting a signature hairstyle ( yes the straight backs I always rock are part of the reinvention) . The fifth was learning how to accessorize, bags, belts, neck pieces, ear pieces (still heavily working on this cause ear pieces and I are not the best of friends lol but yes that's step number five. The sixth and very crucial is shoes! fun fact as you shop for shoes you should consider how you walk and how your shoes wear out and tear. Knowing this will hep you buy shoes that will help you maintain your posture as you walk and stand cause of the obvious reason of comfort. The seventh was learning how to shop what's the difference oh baby I wish I could get into it here but that deserves its own post. The eighth was to show up!

I clearly haven't gotten into how knowing all these things changed me in the world I live in but a little background ain't ever hurt nobody right? See you on the next chapter!!